Happy people understand that life isn’t going to be flawless. They don’t judge others – in fact, they love almost everyone they come in contact with. They look for the good in their co-workers, their family members and even in themselves.
Happiness shouldn’t depend on anything external. If you think you’ll be happy only when you get something, become something, go somewhere or meet someone, you’ll be disappointed. You may experience some pleasure when you get, become, go or meet what you think you need. That’s pleasure, not happiness. Yearning for perfection instead of embracing and loving your current state only holds you back. That resistance, that wanting something else or something more prevents joy. Worse, it also prevents contentment and thus prevents happiness. Looking beyond imperfections–even embracing them–loving yourself before you get, go or meet, won’t bring pleasure. It also doesn’t prevent pleasure. What it does is help you become content, and contentment can bring you happiness.
Accept yourself completely, knowing you possess a combination of qualities. Instead of bringing attention to your weaknesses, view them as gifts to transform into the wholeness of your being. It’s pointless striving to become someone you’re not. To maintain a facade over time is exhausting and strips you of your authentic self. We are not attracted to others because of their virtues; their wholeness of character is what resonates with us most.
I appreciate the message from psychotherapist and author David Richo who writes: “Error and errancy are not tragedies. They are ingredients of and directions to discovery. They show us paths that humble us, startle us, and point us to new horizons. They do not have to lead to regret or shame. We say yes to our imperfection and accept our mistakes.” Welcome your imperfections and stop seeing them as an impairment. Delight in them, while impacting the lives of others.
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