We would do anything for love, wouldn’t we? I completely agree and I sincerely believe that women are very emotional beings, who can often change the direction of the blowing winds, move mountains and build bridges in the middle of desserts only to be with the man we adore. I am not so sure that the same is true for the stronger sex, but I’ll write about that another time. Today I would like to focus on the importance of female friends and how much we need their company. Sincere. Genuine. A chat on the phone that lasts from Koper to Ljubljana, while Patrizia, a soulmate from elementary school and high school is chopping carrots and apples, and I get the feeling that my head is inside her mixer, and on top of everything her laughter is so loud my car trembles. All the while we keep talking about Asos and the newest sandals, about skiing and deserts, she mentions her partner ever so briefly, who has just gone for a run, and in this moment there is just she and I. And when I finish the conversation, I know that I was right there beside her, even though I haven’t seen her in oh, so many months, haven’t even heard from her, but our ways are always aligned, yin and yang, so many memories and silly things, so much love and so many guys that we could throw into the sea now, but we didn’t know that at the time. Our friends share their wisdom with us and make us feel better when everything goes wrong; and what fascinates me the most is the fact that they live in a timeless space where there are no resentments and hurtful words, only empathy, simply because we are women. The right man makes us happy and satisfied, of course, but there is no way to allow him to ever become a replacement for our wonderful female friends.
There were times, when women sat around the fire, talked while cleaning up their homes, had lots of children and waited for their men attentively. They spent a lot of time together and supported each other while keeping up with all of their errands in a way that is simply not realistic nowadays. It seems to me that love can become a religion, and it is at that particular moment that it stops being love altogether. Because true love should never demand from you to choose between your partner and your friends. A couple’s isolation is a kind of running away from the real world, and it is also the moment you become an alien to the real life. I’m not talking about the beginnings, of course, when you’re a couple of feet above the ground in one way or another, and every minute without your man is a minute half lost, and the passion does its thing to make everything more intense. But even though I adore feeling the butterflies in my stomach and I do believe that we should never go without them, the female friendship must remain a pastel-coloured oasis of peace, smelling of Chanel Nr. 5. Not because I like this particular scent, but because it’s an eternal one. A feeling of an eternal relationship is something that sooths me immeasurably; you would walk through fire for your friends and you’re sure that nothing really bad is going to happen, but you can lose the right man quite easily somewhere along the way. What I know about my women is that I shared a piece of my life with them, they’re a part of my past and at the same time the ones I can call anytime, even at midnight and just because i got wax on my trousers and have no idea how to get rid of it.
I have some single friends, some divorced ones, some that are in a relationship and we all share a common life energy. Each of us is in our own wrapped up unique world, however, none of us has made the mistake of turning her man into an idol, burning the bridges and locking herself up in a castle that can easily become a dangerous prison. To love is not to own the person that you love, and a friendship should have wings. It’s as if our soulmates were angels, who can sense our moment of need and they appear or call exactly when we think really deeply about them. And the best thing is, we all have a crazy life full of errands, mine is especially wild because of the unusual work that I do, but when we get together we still chat about the same things: Hugh Jackman under the shower in the movie Australia (OK, I’ll admit it, this scene is a kind of obsession for me, I think I forgot to breathe in the cinema …), David Ghandy in Dolce & Gabbana underwear, then we change the subject and it’s time for Christmas cookies recipes, the new Marc Jacobs perfume and the McLaren stroller review. You see? This is the incredibly fun female company that we shouldn’t exchange for anything in the world, simply because it is unique and because similar energies are attracted to each other so insanely.
I do hope that your man understands. If he doesn’t, change him for another.