When we are young we start to develop views about ourselves and the world. These beliefs are usually heavily impacted by what people tell us and our experiences. In addition, there are genetic and biological influences on our thinking patterns. People genetically prone to depression or anxiety are more likely to have these negative thoughts. They might get stuck in the cycle of low mood or high anxiety, activating negative core beliefs, which reinforce the mood and anxiety, and so forth.
How to change negative beliefs? First of all realize that you are not alone. Often people think they are the only ones who feel like something is wrong with them. People you respect and people who seem to have everything going for them also have negative beliefs about themselves. This type of thinking is part of the human condition, and you are not alone! Secondly challenge your beliefs. Negative core beliefs tend to have an all-encompassing, all-or-nothing quality to them. These characteristics are problematic because they lack nuance and make you feel bad about yourself.
Another approach to these thoughts is: acknowledging the thought, validating yourself, and moving on to doing something else. You can distract yourself or refocus your attention on something important to you or what you value. Most of us have untrue negative core beliefs that start in childhood and stick around throughout life. The problem is that people believe them, especially when they are feeling vulnerable. Reminding yourself that most people have these thoughts can help you feel less alone. Mindfulness sets out to change your relationship to your thoughts. Try viewing your thoughts and feelings as objects floating past you that you can stop and observe or let pass you by.
Become aware of how your thoughts are impacting your emotions and behaviors. Observe your thoughts. Challenging these negative thoughts and moving on to thinking or doing something more affirming can help you lessen their power over you.
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